Let’s remember that back in the days of true self-reliance in America and Europe (and in many parts of the world still today) where you were either self-reliant or dead, you did not do all the work alone. You had a whole extended family spanning multiple generations that worked together to stay alive.
Not only that, but many tasks were also done on a tribe or community level, for example hunting big game, harvesting, and so on.
Today on the other hand, the tribal and family units have been fragmented and we’re pretty much all on our own. We put our parents in homes and our children in daycare while we spend most of our waking time at work, and it’s not unusual today to not even know the names of your neighbors. And that’s why complete self-reliance is hard today.